Last year, like most years, I made New Years Resolutions on the first of January. For awhile, I stuck with them. The trouble started somewhere during the middle of January - um, second. After that, it was all down hill, and by January third, I was just as unhealthy, disorganized and lazy as always. The only difference - instead of the month before, when I'd been pretty okay with myself, in January I felt like a failure. I remember beating myself up so badly, I had actual bruises.
Now I realize I was being unrealistic - I'm not going to change overnight. But I do want to experience the satisfaction of accomplishment. This year, I think I've found a way to do that. Here are my New Years Resolutions for 2009:
1 ) Gain 10 pounds (I'm pretty sure I can do this, because I got a good start during the holiday season)
2) Exercise less (I'll start by parking as close to the mall entrance as I can, and whenever possible, taking the elevator instead of the stairs)
3) Eat fewer fruits and vegetables (salsa, potato chips and ketchup don't count)
4) Watch more TV (not including anything educational or informative like the stuff on PBS)
5) Read fewer books (should be easy - I'll be busy watching TV)
6) Increase credit-card debt (another one where I got a jump-start during the holidays)
7) Increase stress (should happen automatically due to increased credit-card debt)
These Resolutions were pretty easy to come up with; they're basically the opposite of last year's. And with my 2009 resolutions, there's nothing to lose. If I accomplish them, I'll have the satisfaction of knowing I've set goals and reached them. If I don't, I'll have a sense of failure, but least I'll be healthier, smarter and wealthier.
In that unlikely case, I'll find some way to console myself.
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